CIL VI 12194 (Re-)Discovered in the Villa Wolkonsky

This week saw the opening of an archaeological exhibition in the Villa Wolkonsky, home of the British ambassador to Italy in Rome.

News reports covered the (re-)emergence of hundreds of marble artefacts in the wake of the ambassador’s wife’s efforts to restore the villa’s gardens.

The grand opening ceremony was beautifully captured in a photo stream on Flickr.

An item that immediately caught my eye was a inscribed funerary monument, which has its central inscription framed by two somewhat worn, yet still rather splendid reliefs, representing a couple:

Image source: https://www.flickr.com/photos/ukinitaly/15988834121/in/set-72157649688392291.

Nina Prentice presenting funerary momument CIL VI 12194. – Image source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/ukinitaly/15988834121/in/set-72157649688392291.

Here is a close-up of the monument:

CIL VI 12194. – Image source: https://www.flickr.com/photos/ukinitaly/15371225053/in/set-72157649688392291 (cropped and enhanced).

CIL VI 12194. – Image source: http://www.flickr.com/photos/ukinitaly/15371225053/in/set-72157649688392291 (cropped and with slightly enhanced contrast).

The inscription, previously edited in the Corpus Inscriptionum Latinarum as CIL VI 12194 (cf. p. 3510), reads as follows:

D(is) M(anibus).
D(ecimus) Apuleius Carpus
vivus fecit sibi et Apule-
iae Rufinae coniugi
inconparabili liberisq-
ue suis libertis libertabus-
que posterisque eorum.

To the spirits of the departed.

Decimus Apuleius Carpus had this made for himself while still alive as well as for Apuleia Rufina, his incomparable wife as well as their children and their freedmen and freedwomen and their offspring.

The image confirms that the editors of CIL VI introduced slight misreadings on both occasions in their edition when dealing with this particular inscription. The original edition misread the adjective inconparabili as incomparabili in a normalising fashion. This mistake was corrected in the addenda on CIL VI p. 3510, when the name of the male deceased – clearly Apuleius – was mistakenly edited as Appuleio.

One must note the unusual shape of the letter B in this inscription, converging, at least to a certain extent, to the shape of a lower-case b – the so-called B “à panse à droite”.

Posted in Epigraphy, Prose | Tagged , , | Comments Off on CIL VI 12194 (Re-)Discovered in the Villa Wolkonsky

Hadrian’s Wall Rocks!

Last weekend I was hunting inscriptions near Hadrian’s Wall. In particular, I was keen to see a number of Carmina Latina Epigraphica in Carlisle’s magnificent Tullie House Museum & Art Gallery – if you have never been, do go and visit!

My visit was both highly enjoyable and successful, not least thanks to the museum’s wonderfully knowledgeable and forthcoming curator, Mr Tim Padley.

Among other things, I discovered that one of the texts had been slightly misread in the past – always a highlight for an epigraphist, underlining the continued vital importance of the principle of autopsy.

But as the reader of this blog may get a bit tired of my constant preoccupation with the Latin verse inscriptions, I would like to present a selection of other texts that I managed to see on my trip.

1. A Greek Poem from Corbridge, Northumberland

When in Tullie House, I was thrilled to see, on display, a Greek verse inscription from Corbridge (RIB 1124 = IG XIV 2553):

Altar for Astarte. Photo: PK. © Tullie House Museum, Carlisle.

Altar for Astarte. – Photo: PK. © Tullie House Museum, Carlisle.

Ἀστ[άρ]της
βωμόν μ’
ἐσορᾶς·
Ποῦλχέρ μ’
ἀνέθηκεν.

You behold me, an altar for Astarte: Pulcher set me up.

A humble hexameter, and one of a mere four (!) verse inscriptions in the Greek language that have been discovered in Britain to the present day.

2. Quarry Inscriptions at Comb Crag

Staying in a delightful B&B at Low Row, Cumbria, my host suggested looking for a set of Latin inscriptions that were reported for the Roman quarry at Comb Crag, situated by the river Irthing and ‘located on the east face of the cliff at Coombe Crag, 535 m. south-west of milecastle 51’ (as noted by Roman Inscriptions of Britain, ad n. 1946).

Comb Crag quarry site.

Comb Crag quarry site. – Image: Google Maps.

I managed to inspect the following items (clicks on the links will take you to the edition and translation in RIB):

a. RIB 1946

RIB 1946. – Photo (c) P.K 2014.

RIB 1946. – Photo (c) P.K 2014.

b. RIB 1947

RIB 1947. – Photo (c) P.K 2014.

RIB 1947. – Photo (c) P.K 2014.

c. RIB 1948

RIB 1948. – Photo (c) P.K 2014.

RIB 1948. – Photo (c) P.K 2014.

d. RIB 1950

RIB 1950. – Photo (c) P.K 2014.

RIB 1950. – Photo (c) P.K 2014.

e. RIB 1951 (and 1952?)

RIB 1951. – Photo (c) P.K 2014.

RIB 1951 (and 1952?). – Photo (c) P.K 2014.

RIB 1952 is reported as ‘apparently lost’. According to R. G. Collingwood, the text was ‘almost exactly’ below RIB 1951.

No clear traces of text remain below 1951; yet, closer inspection appears to reveal some faint traces of letters (partly visible in the photo, above, as well).

3. Rediscovering Vergil…?

Okay, I can’t help it – I must return to my beloved Carmina Latina Epigraphica once again.

Inspired by the successful visit of the Roman quarry at Comb Crag, I decided to visit another, nearby Roman quarry at Lodge Crag by Low Row – the find-spot of a peculiar set of texts, RIB 1953 and 1954.

Lodge Crag. – Image: Google Maps.

Lodge Crag. – Image: Google Maps.

RIB 1954, a quote of, or allusion to, Vergil’s Aeneid, had long been on my list of texts of interest, as it had been reported in 1694 and not been seen since:

Aurea per caẹḷụm volitat Victoria pennis

Golden Victory flutters through the sky with her wings.

Accessible by a public footpath, there are two areas of interest. There is an exposed rock face, with a solitary tree on it, to the east of a small wood, and then there is a significant quarry site in that wood. (I kindly spare the reader gory images of sheep carcasses rotting away by that site, sheep that apparently had fallen off the crag there – my degrees did not prepare me for creepy encounters like this!)

According to a note at RIB 1953, ‘Horsley inquired about the inscriptions ‘on’ the crag ‘but was told they were now entirely defaced’. Bruce reported that ‘any trace of antiquity … is entirely removed’.’

I am not entirely sure about that, and I am particularly unsure about that with regard to the exposed rock face that is outside the little wood – here is a panoramic shot of the area from north (on the left of the photo) to south (on the right).

Panoramic shot. (c) P. K., 2014.

Lodge crag, panoramic shot. (c) P. K., 2014.

RIB 1953 and 1954 were described as written on an ‘altar cut on the rock-face’ (and it seems undisputed that both were carved into the rock, rather than a free-standing object).

With a bit of good will, it may in fact be possible to see such a form, just underneath that solitary tree.

Using grazing light and a filter, here is what the rock face looks like:

Did I manage to find the inscription?

I am not at all sure about that.

Certainly nothing that could be read as a text anymore.

But it seems (to me, anyway) as though there were traces of letters there at some point – now weathered beyond recognition.

So perhaps this was the find-spot?

It is nice to think that this place, with its magnificent (nowadays even idyllic) view towards Hadrian’s Wall, was the very space in which someone once decided to inscribe a line of Vergil.

But one must be careful for one’s euphoria not to turn into a state of inscriptional paranoia, where one wishes to see letters just about everywhere

Posted in Carmina Epigraphica, Epigraphy | Tagged , , , | Comments Off on Hadrian’s Wall Rocks!

Sick Of It All

Prof. Stefan Grimm. – Image source: http://imperial.tab.co.uk/files/2014/12/Stefan-Grimm.jpg.

Prof. Stefan Grimm. – Image source: http://imperial.tab.co.uk/files/2014/12/Stefan-Grimm.jpg.

Recent days saw a great number of reports, analyses, and comments on the death of Stefan Grimm, late professor of toxicology at Imperial College, London.

Several of these items contained copies of emails that (allegedly) were sent in the context and in the wake of this incident.

Among the most moving pieces in that regard was an an email that appears to have been sent by Prof. Grimm himself, offering his terrifying (yet not altogether inaccurate) insights into the perversions, excesses, and manifestations of anti-intellectual squalor in 21st-century British academia.

The story resonated with me, and I know for a fact that it resonated with many of my academic colleagues and friends as well, who have had similar (if usually rather less drastic or far-reaching) experiences.

Yet, whenever one seems to encounter a particularly compelling story, it is wise to be on the look-out for inconsistencies – and for what remains unsaid.

Quite apart from the fact that Prof. Grimm’s interlocutors, too, deserve to be heard (audiatur et altera pars – whether one appreciates their attitude or not!), and with all due respect to those who are still in pain and mourning over a personal loss: I cannot shake the feeling that we are missing something important here.

For one, we do not actually know what (or who) made Prof. Grimm kill himself.

A ruthless, cynical system? Bullying?

Possible.

But was it that alone?

We do not know. We cannot know.

What we see unfolding in front of our eyes, is the creation of a plot, the interpretative narrativisation of a string of events – compelling to many, as it contains so many familiar experiences.

But do we, the public, actually know anything about what was on Prof. Grimm’s mind?

I don’t.

All that I seem to know is that, with perfect dramatic timing, after about three months, all of a sudden, emails have come to light that offer a story that, for endemic reasons, most academics in British universities can easily relate to (not least in pre-REF-results-weariness).

Coincidence?

Whatever the case may be, one cannot deny a certain desire of one or more parties involved in this unsavoury, deeply saddening story to transform the actual goings-on into a dramatic, well-timed and well-planned performance: a performance, in which certain motivations behind Prof. Grimm’s ‘leaving the stage’ get stressed, while other factors that may have contributed to his decision to end his own life, would seem to remain in the dark.

The combination of the suicide motive with theatrical mise-en-scène has long fascinated me.

Only just recently, for my project on the Latin verse inscriptions, I had the (admittedly somewhat morbid) pleasure to re-read a fascinating text that reports a strikingly similar (and similarly striking) story.

Yet at the same time it is rather more outspoken about the stagecraft and poetic artifice behind the suicide (and the way in which it is told), and it made me wonder if there is a lesson to be learnt in this.

Tombstone from Aeclanum. – Image source: http://db.edcs.eu/epigr/bilder/$IAIrpino_00015_1.jpg.

Tombstone from Aeclanum. – Image source: http://db.edcs.eu/epigr/bilder/$IAIrpino_00015_1.jpg.

Latin documentary evidence for suicides is extremely scarce.

An inscribed sepulchral stele from Aeclanum (near modern-day Mirabella Eclano), dating to the Hadrianic period, is one of the very few surviving documents that explicitly report a voluntary death.

Framed between (i) a prose praescriptum (lines 1–4), dedicating the monument to the divine Manes and giving the deceased’s nomenclature, and (ii) a short prose postscriptum (line 20), containing a reference to the deceased’s wife, the central part of the inscription is made up of a poem (lines 5–19).

This poem is written in fifteen iambic senarii, a common rhythm in the Latin verse inscriptions (and in Roman drama!).

The inscription, as presented in the central area of the stele, reads as follows (CIL IX 1164 = ILS 2953 = CLE 97; for a more recent, emended edition see Mika Kajava and Heikki Solin [no. 15]):

D(is) M(anibus) [s(acrum)].
M(arco) Pomponio M(arci) fil(io) M(arci) n(epoti) M(arci) pron(epoti)
M(arci) abn(epoti) Cor(nelia) Bassulo
IIvir(o) q(uin)q(uennali).
ne more pecoris otio transfungere[r]     5
Menandri paucas vorti scitas fabulas
et ipsus etiam sedulo finxi novas,
id quale qualest chartis mandatum diu.
verum vexatus animi curis anxiis,
nonnullis etiam corpor[is dol]oribus,     10
utrumque ut esset taediosu[m ultr]a modum,
optatam mortem sum pot[itus quae] mihi
suo de more cuncta dat l[ev]amina.
vos in sepulchro hoc elo[gium in]cidite
quod sit docimento post m[eis gentil]ibus     15
inmodice ne quis vitae sco[pulos hor]reat
cum sit paratus portus [navigant]ibus
qui nos excipiat ad quiet[em perpet]em.
set iam valete donec vi[ta aequist pr]eti.
Cant(ria) Long(ina) marit(o) opt(imo) b(ene) m(erenti) f(ecit).     20

(1–4) Sacred to the divine Manes. For Marcus Pomponius Bassulus, son of Marcus, grandson of Marcus, great-grandson of Marcus, great-great-grandson of Marcus, of the Cornelian tribe, duumvir quinquennalis.

(5–8) Lest I misspend life, like cattle, in idleness, I translated a few well-known plays of Menander, and I even, with some industry, created new ones, such, whatever its quality, was committed to paper a long time ago.

(9–13) But tortured by anxious sorrows in my heart, and even some bodily pains, so that both had become a tedious burden beyond measure, I grasped death that I desired, giving me, in its own manner, relief from everything.

(14–18) You have this text inscribed on my tomb, so that it may serve my relatives as evidence, lest anyone be afraid beyond measure of life’s cliffs, when there is a harbour ready for those who navigate the sea, to welcome us to everlasting tranquillity.

(19) But now farewell for as long as there is a life (for you) that comes at a fair cost.

(20) Cantria Longina had this made for her husband, who was the best and most deserving.

The centre piece of this inscription, the poem, purports to be a tantamout to a suicide note – partly inscribed, no doubt, to tell a story, but also to offer advice: there is always an exit available to everyone, an exit to everlasting tranquillity.

The poem is carefully composed. There are three segments of comparable length that constitute the poem’s main part:

  • Bassulus as a dramatic poet (4 lines, ll. 5–8)
  • Bassulus’ suicide (5 lines, ll. 9–13)
  • Bassulus’ advice (5 lines, ll. 14–18)

This is concluded by a one-liner, saying farewell (or rather: ‘so long’) to the living.

In its straightforward three-act design, the poem culminates in a story of mental and physical anguish of a man (of unknown age) who is presented as conceiving himself as an (either humble or depressed-sounding) playwright – a playwright who even in his epitaph casts doubt (in what may well be more than just the accustomed gesture of humility) on his achievements, both in terms of quantity and quality.

In true Sallustian manner, Pomponius Bassulus is shown as suggesting that his industry was a mere attempt to distinguish himself from dumb, idling beasts. A nice touch, to be sure, yet one cannot help but note that Pomponius Bassulus’ humble reference to his career as a playwright (and translator of Menander) is at contrast with the prose praescriptum. The inscription’s opening does not only trace his lineage back over four generations (demonstrating a surprising lack of imagination with regard to the finding of first names, even by Roman standards), but also suggests that he had successfully embarked on a career in local politics.

Returning to the histrionics of the epitaph, the dramatic bearing takes a turn for the tragic around the exact centre of the poem – in fact, line 8 of the poem (= line 12 of the inscription) is the one that mentions Bassulus’ success in seeking relief to his pains through suicide.

It is in this context in which we get to hear, however staged by a dramatic poet (if we are to believe that Bassulus wrote this poem himself), of the complexity of the deceased’s sorrows: mental anguish, physical pains, and both more painful (taediosum – a key term hinting towards suicide in ancient Latin inscriptions) beyond what one might bear (ultra modum).

Modus, measure, in taedium remains a key motive: Bassulus does not propose an easy way out: much rather, he says that there is no need to be afraid in life beyond measure (immodice) – a route not to be taken for as long as life comes at a fair cost, donec vi[ta aequist pr]eti.

Prof. Grimm, like Bassulus someone who could boast of his publication record, appears to have felt that his life no longer came at a fair cost – for whatever reason(s), and possibly even quite literally, if there is any truth to the horrendous details that have emerged from his academic life at Imperial College.

Yet, like Bassulus, he also appears to have taken the step to leave a written text as his legacy, giving a distressing outline of (some of) the cliffs that he was trying to circumnavigate in his professional life.

One wonders how Imperial College (as a mere placeholder for many an academic institution in 21st-century Britain) calculates the fair cost of life these days.

Posted in Carmina Epigraphica, Epigraphy, Poetry | Tagged , , , , , | 1 Comment

Movember: Three Bewhiskered Latin Verse Inscriptions

Lucius Verus and Lucius Falsus in the Römisch-Germanisches Museum, Cologne.

Lucius Verus and Lucius Falsus, both in dire need of a shave, in the Römisch-Germanisches Museum, Cologne.

November is Movember, and as Movember is almost over now, it is high time to present a choice of three outstanding and remarkable inscribed Latin poems that mention beards.

As the idea behind Movember is to raise awareness of men’s health issues, may at least the first one of these poems be a reminder of that important issue.

1. The Perils of a Big City (CIL V 8652 = CLE 629: Zuglio)

[- – -] Laet[i]lio C(ai) [f(ilio) G]a[ll]o
de[c(urioni)] dum c[u]pidus i[u]-
venis urbem voluisse(m)
videre, inde regrediens
incidi febribus acris. at
pres[s]us graviter [a]misi
cu[m] flore i[u]vent[a]m,
quoniam [in]iqua me [i]am
sic fata voca[ba]nt, inton-
samque tuli cru[deli fu]-
nere barbam infelix
nec potui p[e]rfer[r]e vota
meorum. [f]unere acer-
bo iace[o] sedibus istis et
misera mater (h)abet in cor-
de dolorem. cottidie
fletus dat et in pectore
palmas. qui vixit ann(os) XX
m(enses) VII d(ies) VII Laetilia T(iti) f(ilia) Custa
filio carissimo atq(ue) pient(issimo)
mater infel(icissima).

Movember in Fayum. – Image source: http://images.metmuseum.org/CRDImages/eg/web-large/DT202005.jpg

Movember in Roman Egypt. – Image source: http://images.metmuseum.org/CRDImages/eg/web-large/DT202005.jpg

For Laetilius Gallus, son of Gaius, decurion.

When I was a young man still and I had the desire to see the big city, I fell into a painful fever on my way back. Viciously attacked, I lost my youth at its peak, as an unfair fate was already thus calling me, and, out of luck, I took my unsheared beard with me, in a cruel funeral, unable to accomplish what my family was praying for. In this place I lie, in a bitter grave, and my wretched mother feels pain in her heart: every day she cries and hits her chest with the palms of her hand.

He lived twenty years, seven months, and seven days. Laetitia Custa, daughter of Titus, the most wretched mother did this for her most beloved and dutiful son.

2. Cheeky! (CLE 1399: Rome)

Hoc situs est tumulo casto de semine Castus
filius Andreae nomen avi referens
qui nec bis denos vitae contigerat annos
implebat roseas barbula grata genas.

In this tomb lies Castus, sprout of chaste seed, son of Andrea, honouring the grandfather’s name, to whom not even twice ten years of life were granted and who filled his rosy cheeks with a welcome little beard.

3. A Horrendous End … Not Only To Movember (CIL VI 38425 = CLE 1948: Rome)

P(ublius) Grattius Sp(uri) f(ilius)
Col(lina) Celer.
hic ego nunc iaceo Grattius
infelix sub tegmine terrae,
barba deposita peragens
tertium et vicensimum annum,
infelix indigne subiectus
acerbe morte nefanda
occisus calce et manibus extra
fatum protrusus in has tenebras.
hoc opto: moriare malis ex-
emplis cruciatus et ipse,
nec te nunc liceat quo me
privasti lumen videre,
et tu des poenas quas meruist[i]
defensus inique. [- – -]
vos nunc conso[lor – – -]

Publius Grattius Celer, son of Spurius, of the tribus Collina.

I, Grattius, lie here now, under a cover of soil, my beard already removed, aged twenty-three, wretched, defeated in an undignified manner, infuriatingly, killed in an unspeakable murder, kicked and beaten beyond fate, pushed into this darkness.

I have this wish: may he (who did this), too, die, tortured in horrible ways, and may you not be allowed to see the light of day, which you stole from me, may you pay the price that you deserve, without proper guard … I console you now …

The end of Movember is marked by the removal of the moustache – something that neither Laetilius Gallus nor Castus got around to do.

Grattius had his beard removed – not, of course, for charity or any other good cause: the depositio barbae was a rite of passage, a sign that a young man had outgrown youthful folly.

Grattius did not get to enjoy his clearly only just recently celebrated (and thus still noteworthy) maturity, and one can only begin to fathom the pains that his horrendous death caused his family – and the grief that the families of Laetilius Gallus and Castus must have felt over their losses.

So let us hope that Movember does not only raise awareness through token gestures, but actually contributes something that will help to reduce pain and premature death in this world.

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Fixing a Cracked Record

Silenus as a musician. – Image source: http://www.theoi.com/image/T50.1Seilenos.jpg.

Silenus as a musician. – Image source: http://www.theoi.com/image/T50.1Seilenos.jpg.

Vergil, Rome’s most celebrated poet, in his sixth eclogue (an altogether intriguing piece!), imagines a fantastic story.

Silenus lies in a cave, sleeping off his state of inebriation, when two young men, Chromis and Mnasyllos, catch sight of him.

Driven by their feeling defrauded of many a song by Silenus, and supported by the Naiad Aegle, they bind Silenus with his own garlands.

Eventually, Silenus wakes up.

He addresses his assailants as follows (Verg. ecl. 6.23–26):

ille dolum ridens ‘quo uincula nectitis?’ inquit.
soluite
me, pueri: satis est potuisse uideri.
carmina quae uoltis cognoscite: carmina uobis,     25
huic aliud mercedis erit.’ (…)

Laughing at the trick, he said: ‘Why entwist those fetters?
Release me, boys: it suffices to be perceived as powerful.
Hear those songs that you desire: there will be songs for you,
and some other reward for her!’

Satis est potuisse uideriit suffices to be perceived as powerful: an apt summary of most nations’ foreign policy, to be sure, but also (and more importantly) an important turning point in the eclogue itself. It provides the point at which Silenus finally appears ready to live up to his promises, and to sing, overcome by the ‘appearance of power’ (and his remaining intoxication), his resounding song of cosmogony, the power of love, the Muses and poetic initiation, and mythical sin and suffering.

It was this famous passage of power, cosmogony, love, and song (and songs in songs), that I was reminded of, when I went to Italy last week, looking for a number of Latin verse inscriptions for my current research project.

How come?

AE 1972.39. – Photo (c) PK, 2014.

AE 1972.39. – Photo (c) PK, 2014.

One of the inscriptions that I managed to see on an extended walking tour down the Via Appia, was a marble plaque preserved in the context of the catacombs of S. Sebastiano, affixed to a wall by a door in the gift-shop area of the San Sebastiano complex.

The plaque, dating to the second half of the second century A. D., is inscribed as follows (AE 1972.39)

– – – – – –
[- – -]t iam potuisse uideri

[- – – sicut a]ues et garrula cantus
[- – -]ue suas dat voce querellas
[- – – a]ddit postaea dolores
[- – – pr]imae dant littere nomen     5
[- – -]ti, udis athanatos.

In translation (as far as possible, considering the fragmentary state of the inscription):

… already to be perceived as powerful …
… like birds and a garrulous song …

… utters their laments with their voice …
… subsequently adds pains …
… the first letters indicate the name …
… [- – -]t(i)us: no one is immortal.

The plaque is broken into (adjoining) pieces, and it has been resected on the left and on the top (possibly at the bottom as well, but this is less certain). As the text (in typical epigraphical self-referentiality) points out, what has been lost on the left-hand side, in addition to the actual words that opened the surviving lines, is an acrostic, spelling out the name of the deceased.

It is quite possible (but not necessarily cogent) that the deceased was a male, and that his name ended in -t(i)us, as preserved in the final line, preceding the reminder udis athanatos (a translitteration of the Greek phrase οὐδεῖς άθάνατος): similar texts that have the phrase udis athanatos, show personal names, addressed by the inscription, in front of it, and the surviving letters -ti perfectly well fit the morphological requirements for a vocative in this position.

Whatever the name of the deceased, the broken record of his (or her – let’s not rule this out prematurely!) funerary inscription makes numerous references to songs – whether one would like to see the phrase potuisse uideri in line 1 as a reference to Vergil’s aforementioned sixth eclogue or not. (The allusion is too short, and the inscription too fragmented, to be absolutely certain of that, of course.)

Before mentioning  any laments (querellae) and pains (dolores), the inscription specifically refers to ‘birds’ (aues) and ‘garrulous song’ (garrula cantus). Garrula cantus, of course, is a feature that is easily associated with birds themselves (see, for example, CIL VI 34421 and EChrAfr III 176, to mention but two inscriptions).

Garrulus, however, is also a word often associated with the behaviour of young children – and one may wonder if this is not a clue that helps to unlock the entire text, in spite of its high level of fragmentation.

Does it seem unreasonable to assume that a child – boy or girl – managed to cast his spell over his parents: potuisse uideri, even though he (or she) never managed to grow up and show his (or her) actual power? He (or she) acquired the gift of speech and song, birdlike: [- – – sicut a]ues et garrula cantus. Yet, there was reason for querellae, laments, to be voiced (for the deceased himself/herself, or for someone else?) – and eventually, the child even added dolores, pains: undoubtedly a reference to the child’s untimely demise.

Is there anything else one can gauge from the text about the (presumed) child?

Well, one more thing, perhaps.

Udis athanatos, no one is immortal: why does this phrase appear in translitterated Greek? The manfredclauss.com database currently holds five entries for this phrase: four from Rome (this one as well as CIL VI 10889. 20453. 21617), and one from nearby Ostia (CIL XIV 603). All the four other examples in addition to the present case here show Greek personal names – suggesting that the present example of AE 1972.39 belongs into the sphere of Greek migrants in Rome.

Did this young Greek, garrulus (or garrula) and all, too, manage to overpower his/her parents, like Chromis and Mnasyllos did with Silenus in Vergil’s eclogue?

We cannot know.

But it is a lovely thought.

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To Be All Ears

Today, I have had the immense pleasure to visit the University of Pisa. I was invited to talk about an aspect of my recent linguistic research, carried out in 2013 in collaboration with my brilliant undergraduate research assistant Abi Cousins, regarding the discourse about communication disorders in the ancient world.

locandina_singola_Kruschwitz_corretta

Did I give this talk in shameful disregard of my obligations to the British Academy, who stipulated that I must work on nothing but the Carmina Latina Epigraphica during my 2014-5 mid-career fellowship, you ask?

Well, I’d never! My frame of mind and my sense of duty are way too Prussian as to even consider such appalling behaviour!

So where do these two topics meet?

Potentially, or so it would appear, they meet in Epidaurus, on the Peloponnese, of all places – not a particularly likely place to find Latin inscriptions to begin with, but that is a different matter altogether.

Discovered in Epidaurus, by the famous temple of Asclepius, there is a votive inscription that exhibits the iconic shape of a tabula ansata (‘winged tablet’) cut into the stone.

The only thing that is displayed on the tabula ansata, however, is not text, but a pair of ears:

Underneath that tabula, however, there is an elegiac distich, which reads as follows (CIL III 7266 = CLE 866):

Cutius has auris Gallus tibi uouerat olim,
Phoebigena, et posuit sanus ab auriculis.

Cutius Gallus had, once upon a time, promised you these ears,
Offspring of Phoebus, and he put them up, healed, ear-wise.

Unlike my spell checker suggested, Cutius Gallus’ problem was not a name-related ‘cute gall’ or any such bilious issues: according to the above inscription, it was an unknown disease that affected his ears – and it is for this reason that the (votive) ears take centre stage on the tablet (rather than the inscription itself): they are the actual gift to the healer, and the poem is a mere ornament.

Temporary as it would appear to have been, Cutius Gallus’ infliction must have been relatively large-scale (either in terms of the pain that was caused or in terms of the effect it had on his hearing), as one would not normally make such a costly vow for what is but a minor ailment.

Once he was healed, Cutius Gallus appears to have (re-)discovered his good humour, though: note how he refers to the monumental ears as aures, whereas his own, by contrast, are just little auriculae.

So, what’s the connection to communication disorders then, you ask?

My question is this: if Cutius Gallus had a problem with his hearing, a problem so significant that this votive was in order, one must wonder, of course: how did he manage to communicate with his immediate environment – with his family, doctors, and religious personnel?

Did he write? Did he use gestures? (Yes, sign languages are attested for the ancient world, in case you were wondering…)

Communication disorders – including, but not restricted to, stutters, stammers, or mute/deafness – seem easily noticeable in everyday scenarios through obvious disruptions to speech production. Yet, they are in fact rather complex phenomena, caused by a wide and diverse range of issues.

Very obviously, hearing issues are one of many potential causes, as insufficient hearing, if not treated or counterbalanced by supporting aids, does not only make everyday communication difficult or impossible: it also, especially at a young age, may have an effect on one’s ability to speak, resulting in delayed or incomplete forms of language learning – an issue perfectly well known in ancient literature.

An interesting example can be found in sources as early as Herodotus, who presents King Croesus talking with little regard about one of his two sons – to the other! The son who is the subject of the following statement was, according to this version of the story, deaf/mute (Herodotus 1.38.2):

εἷς γάρ μοι μοῦνος τυγχάνεις ἐὼν παῖς· τὸν γὰρ δὴ ἕτερον διεφθαρμένον τὴν ἀκοὴν οὐκ εἶναί μοι λογίζομαι.

You happen to be my one and only child: the disabled one, as far as his hearing is concerned, I do not regard him as existing to me.

A bit harsh?

Well, yes.

In fact, I’d see your ‘harsh’, and raise you a ‘despicable’ … if this attitude had been displayed in our own times and in our own society. (Parallels do exist, sadly.)

But this example is not a modern one. And as usual, it is salutary not just to jump to conclusions and pull the discrimation card for the sake of it, when other societies, remote in time and space, are concerned: a closer look often reveals rather more complex scenarios.

Without going into great detail about attitudes towards disabilities and disfigurement in the ancient world, it seems fair to say that, despite significant changes in attitude since then, one thing has not changed at all: the high value assigned to an unimpaired ability to communicate.

It is easy to feel superior and say ‘we no longer discriminate against those who are affected by communication disorders’. Except, we do, inasmuch we aim to level the playing field, wherever possible, so that the disorder does not cause as much of a disadvantage as it would otherwise. (More extreme and shocking attitudes continue to exist as well, however.)

Our progress, admirable and desirable, is largely the result of technical and medical advancements, not of a deep and fundamental change in attitude – based on our society’s ability and willingness to afford it – and, generally speaking, our (alleged) changes in attitude coincide with those technical advancements, rather than precede them.

It is hard to overestimate the importance and the role that the human voice played in ancient civilisations such as Greece and Rome –societies that were fundamentally oral, reliant on power of the spoken word, to such a degree that rhetorical education became the cornerstone to upper-class education.

Pliny the Elder, for example, in his Naturalis Historia writes that an individual’s voice constitutes a ‘large part’ of a human being’s external features (uox in homine magnam uoltus habet partem), as it is usually recognisable before any visual feature (Plin. nat. 11.271). This, in turn, would imply a notion of significant incompleteness in a person, when this key feature is damaged or absent altogether.

These factors are of even higher significance, of course, for those who, like Croesus, aim to continue their rule through their offspring – after all, members of the ruling class with communication disorders have been subject to immense ridicule since ancient times.

Whether delivered from pain, disorientation, or an actual inability to hear: Cutius Gallus must have been immensely relieved to have been cured, for it allowed him to participate actively again in a society in which unimpaired hearing and speaking, resulting in unimpaired communication, were of pivotal importance to anyone who hoped to make a difference.

[Postscriptum – I wrote large chunks of this post on a train from Rome to Pisa. Opposite me, there was a lady – a property lawyer on her way up north – who for almost two hours yelled into her mobile phone as if it was one of those tin phones that children use. Every other sentence – I’m not even exaggerating – was introduced by the phrase ascoltami, ‘listen to me!’. That is the importance of hearing in (technically) disrupted communication right there for you, I thought.]

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A Latin Poem for the 25th anniversary of the Fall of the Berlin Wall

25 years ago today – it was a Thursday –, I came home from school, in that idyllic world that was Hamburg-Harburg (Heimfeld), I chucked my school bag into a corner, and I started watching Knight Rider (’cause, as I am sure you know, all Germans back then were bizarrely obsessed with everything David Hasselhoff – or not…).

My viewing pleasures got crudely interrupted by the most bizarre press conference that I have ever seen.

One day later, after school on Friday and after a long drive, I was back in my home town of Berlin, celebrating, with my father and my grandmothers, the truly unbelievable and unimaginable things that had just started to happen – crossing a border repeatedly which previously I could only pass at gunpoint.

I had great hopes back then – hopes of a better, more peaceful world, a world that would finally come to its senses.

Having a look at the world today – well, let us just say: there is significant room for improvement…

To commemorate the quarter of a century that has since passed, and in the best tradition of the eclectic creativity that, in its reliance on other poetic sources, has spawned many a poem in the collection of the Carmina Latina Epigraphica, here is a little poem, versified especially for today – inscribed on a wall and everything:

Carmen Epigraphicum Berolinense (a P. K. fictum).

Carmen Epigraphicum Berolinense (a P. K. fictum).

Admiror paries te non populos docuisse

uitandas faciles ad fera bella manus.

I am amazed, wall, that you have not taught the people

that one must eschew those hands

that are easily given to fighting savage wars.

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The Other 99%, Or: Much Ado about Nothus

Entertainment for elites: Vergil reading the Aeneid to Augustus. – http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/8c/Virgil_Reading_the_Aeneid.jpg

Entertainment for elites: Vergil reading the Aeneid to Augustus. – http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/8/8c/Virgil_Reading_the_Aeneid.jpg

Ancient literary Latin poetry – with a few exceptions such as scripts for theatrical performances, for example – is commonly regarded as an upper-class elite phenomenon, and, on average, perhaps rightly so.

This observation was one of the many reasons that, for quite some time now, drew my own research interest to ‘the other 99%‘ of Latin poems – the ‘poetry of the people’, as I have called it for my British Academy-funded project on the Carmina Latina Epigraphica.

Currently, I am carrying out research into the social types that get commemorated in verse inscriptions.

One group that is of particular interest to me is the the group of members of the writing profession.

There is something beautifully ‘meta’ about poems for poets, writers, scribes, and the literati in general, and something sad and sobering about poems for those members of the writing profession who did not make it into our canon and whose outputs did not make it even into the corpora of documentary texts, as they were lost a long time ago.

The following case appears to be one such example.

The tomb of the Statilii in the city of Rome, instituted by Marcus Statilius Taurus (consul A. D. 44)  for the slaves and freedmen of his family, is a fascinating structure.

Designed as a columbarium, the monument provided loculi, little burial niches – niches that, following the deposit of the ashes of the deceased, could be closed with inscribed funerary plaques.

Dating to the first half of the first century A. D., one of the numerous remarkable findings that came from this burial site is the inscribed plaque (40 x 32 cm) for a man named Nothus (CIL VI 6314 cf. p 3419 = CLE 1014):

Nothi librari a manu. ||

Non optata tibi coniunx monimenta locauit,

ultima in aeternis sedibus ut maneant,

spe frustra gauisa Nothi, quem prima ferentem

aetatis Pluton inuidus eripuit.     5

hunc etiam fleuit quaequalis turba et honorem

supremum digne funeris inposuit.

In translation:

(Burial) of Nothus,  librarius a manu.

Not as you desired, your wife has placed your monument here, so that your remains may rest in their eternal settings: in vain I entertained hopes in you, Nothus, whom jealous Pluto took away at the youngest age. A coeval crowd wept for him too, and, in a dignified manner, paid him the last respect of a funeral.

The plaque, resembling a building, with an arched opening, is neatly produced and well laid out. The name of the deceased, in addition to his occupation, is written in a separate field at the top, whereas the poem, in rather smaller, less clear-cut letters, has been inscribed in a dedicated area at the bottom.

The author of these verses – elegiacs – remains unknown, as does the name of Nothus’ wife: the fact that the poem purports to speak in her name does not allow us to infer that she composed the text. All we (seem to) know about the deceased himself is known from this inscription: his name was Nothus (a Greek name, with a latinised ending, meaning ‘illegitimate’), he was a librarius a manu, and he died young – or so the inscription implies.

What exactly is a librarius a manu then?

The Thesaurus Linguae Latinae gives a wide range of potential meanings for the word librarius. It may denote (i) someone who writes books in a book hand, a copyist, a scribe (is qui describit sive ipse legens exemplar sive dictata audiens (sc. servus, libertus, artifex, miles, sim.), (ii) a bookseller (is qui libros vendit), (iii) a teacher of writing (is qui docet artem scribendi), or (iv) a book or record keeper (i. q. tabellarius publicus). (Note, however, that a librarius is not usually a term used to denote a ‘librarian’!)

The addition of a manu (‘from the hand’) would appear to suggest someone who was capable of taking dictations, which, in conjunction with the spectrum of meanings proposed for librarius leads to the assumption that Nothus must have been a private secretary and record or book keeper for his master.

The poem in honour of Nothus (whose name should be added to Heikki Solin‘s Die griechischen Personennamen, 2nd ed., vol. II p. 1070) contains a number of features as well that deserve a brief comment – features that reveal both the desire to commemorate Nothus in a dignified manner and the struggle that it was to achieve this. Minor infelicities aside, one must note that –

  • The opening phrase non optata tibi (‘not as you desired’), in Latin, can go with either coniunx (‘wife’) or monimenta (‘monument’). One would hope for both Nothus and his nameless wife that this ambiguity was an accident rather than intentional.
  • While ultimus is a term that can be found in the context of references to death (‘the utmost’), the use of ultima (line 3) as an expression for ‘(mortal) remains’ is highly unusual.
  • The spelling of Pluton (line 5) with a final -n does not only help to avoid a hiatus, but it also results in a transcription of the Greek spelling of this deity, which would have been called Pluto in Latin.
  • The word quaequalis (line 6), written as a single unit in this inscription does not actually exist in Latin. Regardless of the absence of word-dividing punctuation, as found otherwise in this inscription, Franz Bücheler, the editor of the Carmina Latina Epigraphica proposed to read quae qualis, as a Grecism for τίς ποῖος (‘some such’). A more convincing solution has been suggested by the editors of the Thesaurus Linguae Latinae, who proposed to read it as a spelling variant of coaequalis, ‘coeval’ (ThLL s. v. coaequalis, 1372.18-9).

The expression of the final distich, honorem | supremum digne funeris inposuit (‘in a dignified manner, paid him the last respect of a funeral’) is odd as well – honorem imponere, literally ‘to impose an honour’ is not a common way of expressing the bestowing of an honour.

Imponere, however, is a term that particularly frequently features in the context of servile language – it can be found in a wide range of contexts, from ‘imposing a command’ to ‘imposing punishment’ to ‘bestowing freedom’.

Was it from their everyday experience that the writer of this poem for Nothus, freedman (or so it would appear, as a wife is mentioned) of the Statilii, drew this expression?

Whatever the case may be, it is easy (and cheap) to be irked by infelicities in expression and metrical design – belittling the efforts of those who, for whatever reason, did not employ a literary artist for their personal glory – as if any such criticism rendered the text and its underlying motivation less sincere and less valuable.

To me, this text teaches an important lesson: very much like the 1%, the other 99%, too, had a desire not to be forgotten, to find dignity and respect at least in death – the use of honorem and digne in the final distich is a clear, unambiguous expression of this.

Listening to their poetry and its imperfections (as well as its many gems) reveals many a story – and it tells of hopes and disappointment (note the use of spe frustra gauisa, line 4: ‘in vain I entertained hopes’) of those people who do not commonly get mentioned by the elite and their writers.

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Trick or Treat? Torture, Death, and a Chilling Poem

Halloween 2014 is near. As every year, people around the globe will celebrate this occasion. Children and grown-ups alike will indulge themselves in the pleasurable thrill that arises from this day’s spooky combination of the fantastic with the morbid.

Halloween derives its peculiar dynamics from this haunting combination, blurring and blending  otherwise absolutely certain and irrevocable distinctions between ‘our’ world and the other – a netherworld full of rot, decay, and frightening creatures.

Despite its Christian name Hallow e’en, denoting the eve of All Saints’ day, the roots of Halloween appear to go back to an earlier stage. It may well be related to pagan rites and one of the many festivals that existed (and continue to exist) everywhere, in every civilisation, and at all times, that invoke the presence of netherworldly spirits and imagine a contact with the dead.

Nowadays, Halloween is, or rather: can be, a day of fantastic story-telling (or even story-enacting). These stories bring about a haunted fantasy world, spooky and scary, of course, yet irresistably appealing, impossible to ignore – especially as there are sweets aplenty on offer as well (presumably in a sustained effort to extend the prevailing rot-and-decay theme to children’s teeth).

A haunted world provides entertainment and fascination only for as long as we can securely rely on the knowledge that all of this is, in fact, a game, a staged performance. We would like to , and we must, be reassured that there are not any actual monsters, zombies, and spectres around, walking about in our streets and inhabiting our neighbours’ houses.

But what if gory horror were to become part of the real world, the world that we encounter? What if such gruesomeness that we playfully invoke on occasion of Halloween were to be part of the world as we can experience it? (Not that this is, in fact, particularly hard to imagine in times in which the radical propagators of the Islamic State celebrate staged and choreographed public violence for propaganda purposes just as much as for the advancement of their cause.)

A deeply unsettling, chilling thought – stuff that nightmares are made of, and stuff that requires healing powers of coping mechanisms.

Such desire to dispel the spectres of a gory, gruesome other world  and to transform haunted spaces into a safe harbour appears to have been the underlying motivation for the creation (and use) of a most remarkable Latin poem, which has been incorporated in  the rich and diverse corpus of Latin verse inscriptions, the Carmina Latina Epigraphica – the collection of poems that is at the heart of my current British-Academy-funded research project ‘Poetry of the People’.

Conveniently for a blog post  on occasion of the celebrations of the eve of All Saints’ day, our poem also appears to relate to a Christian martyr and saint, viz. Saint Engratia.

The inscription in question appears to have read as follows (CLE 1448 = ICUR II 46; substantially emended by J. Gil, CFC 14, 1978, 113–9):

Hic inhumata pridem cadabera lapsa iacebant

tabidaq(ue) omentis, frustris et artris atris

huc cernebamus amplis cuneis fluitare catervas,

rorare caducum fuso Falerno limum:

stolida per eresi litabant vota favillis;     5

(i)staque femineo iam pars funesta stupro

mancipatur Avernis umbrisq(ue) truditur imis.

quo funus squalebat <at> ara sacra micat,

hanc tibi stirps edem parat, Engra(tia), Prisci

quam vulneris guttis abluas, alma, rubris.     10

Eusebius invexit huc te, beata, sacerdos,

aeterni martir currens ad arce poli.

culmine mira vota que quisquis prespicis intrans,

hec ope levite Mileti dedicat.

In translation:

Here used to lie, in times past, uninterred, corpses, fallen,
with their bowels putrid and body parts and limbs blackened.
Hither we used to see streaming crowds, in huge droves,
to soak the sliding mud with spilled Falernian wine:
on account of their foolish heresy, they consecrate their promises to the ashes;
and this place, netherworldly already due to feminine sin,
is transformed into an Underworld and shoved down to the deepest shades.
The place is filthy with death, but a holy altar stands out in splendour:
an offspring of Priscus made this temple for you, Engratia,
a temple which you cleansed with the red drops of your wound.
Eusebius, the priest, has moved you in here, blessed,
a martyr, on your way to the summit of the eternal heaven.
The amazing decoration (?) above that you see upon entering,
those are dedicated to you courtesy of Miletus, the deacon.

The (lost) inscribed monument, introduced by a chi-rho symbol an followed by the line amen. deo gratias  (‘Amen. Thank be to God’), appears to have been once created to commemorate the construction of the Basilica of Santa Engrácia in Zaragoza.

It survives reported in a Parisian manuscript of the 9th century, and, while it refers to proceedings of the early 4th century A. D., there are reasons to believe that it has been inscribed at some point in the 6th century or later.

Bodies, uninterred and festering, a place polluted by murder, putrefaction – stained even further by the way in which the masses derived their perverted pleasure from celebrating such acts: how can a place like this ever be cleansed?

The writer of the poem chooses a simple model: he (presumably a ‘he’ rather than a ‘she’, anyway) builds up a contrast between the hellish environment of a place ‘filthy with death’ and the clean, shiny shrine, and then reinterprets the previously disgusting fluids that resulted from a murder – the ‘red drops of your wound’ – into the pure, cleansing substance that gives the place its special (religious) meaning.

Most of all, however, this poem, too, is a great example of gruesome story-telling: it brings to life the author’s vision of an horrendous past, offering a vivid imagination of cruelties past, only to provide a soothing turn and to draw attention to the structure for which this poem was originally intended.

The poet demonstrates his control over the demons of the past and asserts his prerogative of (re-)interpretation, when he invites that haunted past to take centre stage at the beginning of his poem, only to subject it to his (narrative) rule, leaving behind a place that is not only cleansed, but – according to the poem’s final distich – even neatly adorned.

What the author chooses to suppress, however, is that, without the grim tale that preceded the foundation of the shrine, heavenly order was not only (relatively) meaningless, but impossible.

In that respect: spooky Halloween, everyone! (Just don’t forget to restore order afterwards…)

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The Top 3 (+1) Latin Poems on STDs and Related Issues [NSFW]

SHAG week giveaways.

SHAG week giveaways.

This week is SHAG week at the University of St. Andrews, where I am spending a wonderful time at the moment working on my project on the Latin verse inscriptions.

One aspect that makes the subject of my research so exciting is its versatility, brought about by the wide range of issues covered in these remarkable texts, from the mundane to the highly philosophical.

This week’s examples will be on the mundane side – and decidedly so.

Unlike the  name suggests, SHAG week is not an invitation to a week of widespread, uninhibited consensual sexual pleasures (we are in Britain after all!).

Much rather, it is a week dedicated to Sexual Health Awareness and Guidance, with numerous activities and workshops offering quintessential advice on sexual health and hygiene as well as on the DOs and DON’Ts of consensual sex – important lessons to learn early on.

So, as a contribution to St. Andrews’ 2014 SHAG week, here are my personal Top 3 Latin inscribed poems on symptoms that may hint towards venereal diseases or sexually transmitted diseases (existence, spread, and extent of ancient medical awareness of which are matter of ongoing academic debate), or at least loosely related issues to do with less-than-desirable side-effects of love-making – just to make sure everyone knows exactly what to avoid (or to expect).

Out of pure generosity, a poem of the rather NSFW collection of the Carmina Priapea has also been thrown in, for your reading pleasures (?).


A word of warning: if you are easily offended by explicit sexual content – do stop reading here!


1. CIL IV 1516 = CLE 955 (Pompeii)

Hic ego nu[nc f]utue formosa(m) fo[r]ma puella(m)
laudata(m) a multis, set lutus intus eerat.

Here I have now shagged a girl, beautiful of appearance,
praised by many, but inside she was pure slime.

A famous epigram, here in a version from Pompeii, that has, with some variations, become known from a number of places across the Roman Empire. It is not known, of course, what exactly this writer was referring to when suggesting that she was lutus inside. A nearby inscription of the same type (CIL IV 1517) opens virtually identically, but then refers to a disease (morbus) that affected the girl’s face.

Lutus as a reference to a (clearly undesirable) vaginal discharge is also used in Carmina Priapea 83.37 (transl. Sir Richard Burton):

Quid hoc novi est? Quid ira nuntiat deum?
Silente nocte candidus mihi puer
tepente cum iaceret abditus sinu,
venus fuit quieta, nec viriliter
iners senile penis extulit caput.     5
Placet, Priape, qui sub arboris coma
soles, sacrum revincte pampino caput,
ruber sedere cum rubente fascino?
At, o Triphalle, saepe floribus novis
tuas sine arte deligavimus comas,     10
abegimusque voce saepe, cum tibi
senexve corvus impigerve graculus
sacrum feriret ore corneo caput.
Vale nefande destitutor inguinum,
vale Priape: debeo tibi nihil.     15
Iacebis inter arva pallidus situ,
canisque saeva susque ligneo tibi
lutosus affricabit oblitum latus.
At o sceleste penis, o meum malum,
gravi piaque lege noxiam lues.     20
Licet querare, nec tibi tener puer
patebit ullus, imminente qui toro
iuvante verset arte mobilem natem,
puella nec iocosa te levi manu
fovebit apprimetve lucidum femur.     25
Bidens amica Romluli senis memor
paratur, inter atra cuius inguina
latet iacente pantice abditus specus,
vagaque pelle tectus annuo gelu
araneosus obsidet forem situs.     30
Tibi haec paratur, ut tuum ter aut quater
voret profunda fossa lubricum caput.
Licebit aeger angue lentior cubes,
tereris usque, donec (a miser! miser!)
triplexque quadruplexque compleas specum.     35
Superbia ista proderit nihil, simul
vagum sonante merseris caput luto.
Quid est, iners? Pigetne lentitudinis?
Licebit hoc inultus auferas semel,
sed ille cum redibit aureus puer,     40
simul sonante senseris iter pede,
rigente nervos excubet libidine,
et inquietus inguina arrigat tumor,
neque incitare cesset usque dum mihi
venus iocosa molle ruperit latus.     45

What news is this? What does the anger of the gods announce? When in the silent night a lovely boy lay with me hidden in my warm bosom, my desire was quiescent, nor did the sluggish penis courageously raise its senile head. Does it please thee, Priapus? who under the foliage of a tree art wont, thy sacred head circled with the leaves and tendrils of the vine, ruddy to sit with rubicund fascinum. But, O Triphallus, oft fresh flowers with loving care have I wreathed in thy locks; and oft driven off with my shouts an aged raven or an active jackdaw when it would have pecked thy sacred head with its horny bill. Fare thee well, Priapus, I owe thee naught. Farewell, impious forsaker of the privities, thou shalt he in the glebe mouldy with neglect; a savage dog shall continually piss upon thee, or a wild boar rub against thee his side befouled with mire. O cursed father of the penis, to whom my calamity [is due], thou shalt expiate this injury with a severe and pious atonement. Thou canst complain: no tender lad shall yield to thee who on the groaning bed with aiding art shall writhe his mobile buttocks. Nor shall a sportive girl caress thee with her gentle hand, or press against thee her lubricious thigh. A mistress with two teeth is prepared for thee, who can call to mind the time of Romulus; and amid her gloomy loins and loose-stretched hide, covered with frost and full of mould and cobwebs, thy privity shall blockade the entrance. This is the one prepared for thee, that thrice and four times her bottomless ditch may swallow up thy lubricious head. Notwithstanding weak and languid thou liest, thou shalt shag her again and again until, O miserable wretch, thrice and fourfold thou fillest her cavity. And now thy pride shall avail thee naught when thou plungest thy reeling head into the splashing mire. Why is [my yard] inert? doth not its sluggishness displease thee? This once thou mayst deprive it of vigour with impunity. But when that golden boy shall return, at the same time that thou hearest the patter of his foot upon the path, on a sudden let a restless swelling excite my nerves with lust and raise my privy part; nor let it cease to incite more and more until sportive Venus shall have spent my feeble strength.


2. CIL IV 1882 (cf. p. 465) = CLE 47 (Pompeii)

Accensum qui pedicat urit mentulam

He who buggers an inflamed, burns his prick.

This one-liner derives its jocular force from the ambiguity of the term accensus (‘inflamed’), denoting either someone suffering from some kind of inflamation – or, as a technical term, the holder of a low-level office.


3. CIL IV 1820 (cf. p. 704) = CLE 50c (Pompeii)

Chie, opto tibi ut refricent se ficus tuae
ut peius ustulentur quam ustulatae sunt
.

Chius, I hope your piles will become irritated again,
so that they may get inflamed worse than they were inflamed before.

In antiquity, piles were taken to be a side-effect of anal penetration, as e. g. Edward Courtney pointed out – thus this short epigram is to be included among the others here, as a double threat against Chius: the writer wishes him to be at the (according to ancient thought: less desirable) receiving end of anal intercourse, and he hopes that it will result in additional pains as well.

Chius may not be the name of any specific person, but merely a pun, as the best figs (ficus) were said to come from the island of Chios. Except that ficus is also the Latin term for ‘piles’…


Tracy Jordan, in the US comedy programme 30 Rock, advises Kenneth, the page, to live every week like it’s Shark Week.

Looking at the sound advice provided in leaflets and other materials, one should add: live every week like it’s SHAG week, too!


Read more about sexual diseases and the ancient world (to give but a small selection, from the entertaining to the technical):

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